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How Men Cope With Divorce

Because women tend to be more open with their feelings than men, and are more likely show their grief and pain during and after the end of their marriage, you might think that divorce is easier for men. However, many relationship experts believe that men actually have a harder time getting over divorce than women do.

In an online article in Psychology Today, author Elizabeth Aura McClintock Ph.D. says, “Indeed, divorce is associated with worse physical and mental health more strongly for men than for women (Robards 2012). These negative health effects are not trivial—men are more likely than women to develop suicidality after a separation (Kolves 2010). Women may actually experience some health benefits from breaking up. For example, when stable heterosexual couples are asked to sleep apart (not sharing the same bed or sleeping space), women’s quality of sleep is improved whereas men’s quality of sleep is reduced (Dittami et al 2007).”

In another article in Huffington Post, Brittany Wong writes:

“When it comes to advice on moving on post-split, men seem to get the short shrift. The reality is, divorce is just as crushing for men as it is for women. Most of us take our vows with the intention for the marriage to last. Rerouting your future when the relationship falls apart is hard regardless of whether you’re a man or woman.

To help balance things out a bit, we asked a few male divorced writers to share their best advice on rebuilding after divorce.”

Their advice included:

  1. Remember that you only divorced your spouse, not your kids.
  2. Stop asking, “What if?”
  3. Don’t feel guilty… unless there’s reason to be.
  4. Don’t introduce your kids to everyone you date.
  5. Don’t get too invested in a rebound relationship.
  6. Add some routine to your life.
  7. Learn everything you can from the experience of being married.

To get the reasoning behind each of these points, read the whole article at http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/7656814.

Are you going through a divorce? Or have you already gone through one? If so, please leave a comment below and share what helped you the most. Every bit of useful information helps when going through such a tough time.

 

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