How to Bounce Back from Divorce - Nolo Press Occidental

Divorce may be one of the most difficult transitions in your life. You can expect to go through alternating cycles of shock and denial, anger and depression, and understanding and acceptance.

Eventually acceptance becomes stronger and lasts longer. Here are 10 things you can do to help bounce back from divorce, as revealed in divorce expert Ed Sherman’s book Make Any Divorce Better.

* Seek quiet and rest. Take extra good care of yourself. Exercise, eat properly, keep life as simple as possible.

* Acknowledge and express your feelings. Talk to someone who knows how to listen. Keep a journal.

* Seek out support from friends, family, clergy, divorce or crisis support groups and counselors.

* Stay aware. Don’t try to alter or numb your feelings with substances, such as alcohol, drugs, or overeating.

* Be realistic in what you can expect from yourself. It is normal to have mood changes, to feel confused, to have mixed feelings about your spouse.

* Have faith in your beliefs and in yourself. Remember to be grateful for what you do have. Having life, you are a miracle of creation. You are alive, you can feel, learn, and grow.

* Work. Enjoy the benefits of a daily schedule and of accomplishment, especially in the small changes you are gradually adding to your life to make it better.

* Be good to yourself.

* Take time to be with other adults and to enjoy social activities when you are ready.

* Remember that healing is already in process. Time and nature are on your side. You will recover.